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Bee Eater

by Emily Brown

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1.
It’s time that you realized who you talk to at night I am a little bird always tensing for flight Can I be trusted? I worry I can’t At least I am who I say I am I know I’m not living for anyone else Don’t harbor foolish illusions about my simple self, but Should you rely on me? I worry you can’t At least I am who I say I am Chorus And some girls out to tell you they’re the one that you need That’s not me, that’s not me, that’s not me See, I’m the one you get wary of when you feel you’ve begun to believe Do you get it? Do you understand? Do you see? It’s time that you knew just who you’ve let in your heart I hold a standing ticket for the next plane to depart, and The feeling that burns in me is aching to fly Too restless to tell you or say goodbye Chorus
2.
In My Dreams 03:10
I know I’ve never dreamed the way I dream But every night I’m haunted by your face I used to spend my nights in peaceful dark And now I wander blind from place to place My love, I’m haunted by the dream of you I find you in my mind And though I know our summer days are through I miss them all the time I never used to dream of sweet romance No love song ever reached my sleeping ear The morning never swooned or sighed or danced But now I find at dawn that you are here My love, I’m haunted by the dream of you If daydreams weren’t enough And though I know our summer days are through I think I fell in love My love, I wander through the night for you As stars and planets sing And though I know our summer days are through I’m living in my dreams
3.
Sometimes 03:34
Sometimes what it is it’s like I’m yelling down a well for you I know you’ll never say you do You do, you do, you do And ancient trees are standing silent, holding all their breath for you I guess I’d rather know you do Than never hear from you Every answer’s clothed in layers of disguise Oh it scares me that I cannot see your eyes I am living in a house with all the blinds raised Watching you look through the windows from outside Sometimes what it is it’s like I’m running down the road for you White cars are chasing into blue You do, you do, you do And everything I ever loved and all the words I thought I knew This road is wearing out my shoes The soles are peeking through All your old ideas have vanished in the light I heard the sound of them escaping in the night You were looking out for someone you could turn to Someone else to tell you what you think is right Who do you think I am to tell you where you stand?
4.
Giving Up 05:59
I'm giving up on what we had It's not that you're poisonous You're not that bad Love rises like trees Sinks us like wayward ships We rode a carousel We didn't know how to quit Yes, I loved you but now I'm three years older And nineteen will always play fool to twenty-two Why do you look back when the girl at hand says, hold her It's getting colder you're turning blue I'm giving up on what we were Love isn't the antidote It isn't the cure I say give it time My guess is a year You broke in the driver's seat Shaking with tears And said there's no one else you would rather saw you crying And my heart full fell when I realized it was me I don't mean to say that the whole time I've been lying I'm only implying I wish I was free
5.
I was not your beautiful baby I was your innocent child I was not your beautiful baby I was your innocent child Chorus And tell me that you meant what you said When you said you loved me still I loved you, I’ve loved you, I will love you, I always will I was not your manifold lover I was your miracled world You and I weren’t made for eachother I’m not that beautiful girl Chorus I was not an eloquent actor I was a trembling bird I said so much I knew didn’t matter I wonder how much you heard Chorus
6.
Unseen Girl 03:18
My love is holding out for an unseen girl She's written in the stars; she's the end of the world He waits for her to hold him in her golden arms She knows some magic word to keep him safe from harm Chorus But could you be a little more specific? Could you tell me about the words she'll sing? I traveled from the South Pacific; I've been true to you and everything If I could fly into the heavens I'd rearrange the stars to see If, with a little shift in planets, The fates could bring you next to me My love is holding out for an unseen girl She's written in the stars; she's the end of the world She’s gonna strike like lighting when the moment comes Ain’t nothing gonna keep him knowing she’s the one Chorus My love is holding out for an unseen girl She's written in the stars; she's the end of the world But Saviors come in faces you don't recognize And if you don't believe in them they're crucified Chorus
7.
True Love 05:03
True love, no I don’t love you still I know you think you do I know you hope I will And pure heart, you get nothing for your grief But salt water in your mouth Blood staining all your teeth Am I the one who deals the blow that takes you down? Hey, you can think on me when you’re heaving on the ground True love, now you’re so young at heart Does your mind race in fear Whenever we’re apart? And pure heart, I don’t know what to say I sink to my bedroom floor The minute you go away Am I the one who deals the blow that takes you down? Hey, you can think on me when you’re heaving on the ground Chorus Mother told me give it, give it, give it time Don’t you know I’m wasting yours when I waste mine Maybe if I give it, give it, give it time to die Don’t you tell me give it, give it, give it time And don’t you hold your breath and hope I’ll change my mind Maybe when you give it, give it, give it time to die True love, tell me what’s in your soul Right when you’re most at peace That’s when you lose control And pure heart, give me the honest truth Struck to the cold cement Here in the bloom of youth And I’m the one who deals the blow that takes you down Hey, do you think on me when you’re heaving on the ground? Chorus
8.
Oh, take me up slowly You don’t even know me Do you know what you want? I get tacit and lonely I wish you could show me you won’t be gone You, you're making the big time You’re not even half mine You don’t even try Oh, take me up slowly Grounded and holy I’m on the line Oh, take me up slowly Grounded and holy I’m on the line I wish I could trust you But I want the hard proof Discernible signs this feels like a good thing Feels like it could be Cracked for the light Oh come and take me up slowly Outside it’s snowing Merry and bright Oh, take me up slowly Outside it’s snowing Merry and bright Sure, the lights are deceiving I’d love to believe in this star-stricken night I don’t think you’ll hurt me I think you’re worthy I think you’re kind So come, take me up slowly But take me up surely Take your time
9.
Who Can Say 04:25
Here he is A boy who can’t solve your problems He wouldn’t know the first way to solve them He wouldn’t know the first place to start Here he is A boy who can’t shoulder your burdens Whose misgivings about you will worsen Before your decisionless heart Chorus Who can say what good your good does anyway? Who can tell If when you intend well, then will it end well? Here he is A boy who can’t solve your problems How could he? You won’t say you’ve got them To think that he could is absurd Here he is A boy who doesn’t know you will hurt him How could he? You hide behind curtains How could he? You don't use your words Chorus Here you are A girl who can’t solve your problems You’ve gone from the top to the bottom You run from the east to the west Here you are A girl who knows her mind outside nothing Whatever you do will be sudden Whatever you think you’ll think best Chorus And when you intend well, then will it end well? And when will it end well and when will it end well?
10.
Stay Lovin 03:36
There are those who'll come to tell you I have sometimes played it false I have used my kind of smiling Like a bluff and taken all Quiet whispers in your ear babe How you should not take my side Stay lovin, oh darlin! I feel the changing of a tide. I got frightened, I took to running I traveled eastward from the west When I packed my bags for London I was sure that I knew best Quick and willing are your informants Who'll say you can’t get hold on me Stay lovin, oh darlin! I’m not the way I used to be. You may hear things through the grapevine You may hear them on the street But believe me, and don’t believe, please every single thing you read I don’t say this to deny them For some may know me by my name But stay lovin oh darlin Though I was she I’m not the same Twice I let my heart be broken Then I did not give my heart Made my faith my base suspicion Every whole I willed apart In your mind you’re bound to question Can a girl like that stay true? Stay lovin, oh darlin! I want to stay on loving you.

credits

released August 31, 2018

All songs written and performed by Emily
Lindenfield: guitar, bass, upright bass, piano, Farfisa, drums, synths
Jaxon Williams: guitar
Aaron Hatch: clarinet
Stuart Wheeler: french horn, vocals
Alyssa Pyper, Mary Nielson, Anne Bennion: violin
Sophie Blair, Michele Gardiner: viola
Max Olivier, Paul Woodward: cello

String arrangements by Lindenfield, with help from Emily on That’s Not Me, True Love
Strings on Who Can Say, Stay Lovin engineered by Chris Bennion, conducted by Lindenfield
Strings on That’s Not Me, Giving Up, True Love engineered by Stephen Cope, conducted by Stuart Wheeler
Engineered (unless noted), Produced and Mixed by Lindenfield
Mastered by Jack Shirley at The Atomic Garden
Recorded between Utah and California between 2015 and 2018.

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Emily Brown Oakland, California

Emily Brown is a Californian songwriter and poet. Her impressive vocal range, wandering melodies, and conversational lyrical style have drawn frequent comparisons to Joni Mitchell, Judee Sill, and Fiona Apple.

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