Bee Eater

by Emily Brown

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03:10
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03:34
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05:59
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03:18
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05:03
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04:25
10.
03:36

credits

released August 31, 2018

All songs written and performed by Emily
Lindenfield: guitar, bass, upright bass, piano, Farfisa, drums, synths
Jaxon Williams: guitar
Aaron Hatch: clarinet
Stuart Wheeler: french horn, vocals
Alyssa Pyper, Mary Nielson, Anne Bennion: violin
Sophie Blair, Michele Gardiner: viola
Max Olivier, Paul Woodward: cello

String arrangements by Lindenfield, with help from Emily on That’s Not Me, True Love
Strings on Who Can Say, Stay Lovin engineered by Chris Bennion, conducted by Lindenfield
Strings on That’s Not Me, Giving Up, True Love engineered by Stephen Cope, conducted by Stuart Wheeler
Engineered (unless noted), Produced and Mixed by Lindenfield
Mastered by Jack Shirley at The Atomic Garden
Recorded between Utah and California between 2015 and 2018.

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about

Emily Brown Oakland, California

Emily Brown is a songer and a singwriter who lives rightly in the city of Oakland, California. Performing sometimes in California and erstwhile in Utah her music she sings it and also plays such instruments as the guitar and the piano, growing in her abilities and being exceedingly funny in between the musical numbers while upon the proscenium or stage. ... more

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Track Name: That's Not Me
It’s time that you realized who you talk to at night
I am a little bird always tensing for flight
Can I be trusted? I worry I can’t
At least I am who I say I am

I know I’m not living for anyone else
Don’t harbor foolish illusions about my simple self, but
Should you rely on me? I worry you can’t
At least I am who I say I am

Chorus
And some girls out to tell you they’re the one that you need
That’s not me, that’s not me, that’s not me
See, I’m the one you get wary of when you feel you’ve begun to believe
Do you get it? Do you understand? Do you see?

It’s time that you knew just who you’ve let in your heart
I hold a standing ticket for the next plane to depart, and
The feeling that burns in me is aching to fly
Too restless to tell you or say goodbye

Chorus
Track Name: In My Dreams
I know I’ve never dreamed the way I dream
But every night I’m haunted by your face
I used to spend my nights in peaceful dark
And now I wander blind from place to place

My love, I’m haunted by the dream of you
I find you in my mind
And though I know our summer days are through
I miss them all the time

I never used to dream of sweet romance
No love song ever reached my sleeping ear
The morning never swooned or sighed or danced
But now I find at dawn that you are here

My love, I’m haunted by the dream of you
If daydreams weren’t enough
And though I know our summer days are through
I think I fell in love

My love, I wander through the night for you
As stars and planets sing
And though I know our summer days are through
I’m living in my dreams
Track Name: Sometimes
Sometimes what it is it’s like I’m yelling down a well for you
I know you’ll never say you do
You do, you do, you do

And ancient trees are standing silent, holding all their breath for you
I guess I’d rather know you do
Than never hear from you

Every answer’s clothed in layers of disguise
Oh it scares me that I cannot see your eyes
I am living in a house with all the blinds raised
Watching you look through the windows from outside

Sometimes what it is it’s like I’m running down the road for you
White cars are chasing into blue
You do, you do, you do

And everything I ever loved and all the words I thought I knew
This road is wearing out my shoes
The soles are peeking through

All your old ideas have vanished in the light
I heard the sound of them escaping in the night
You were looking out for someone you could turn to
Someone else to tell you what you think is right

Who do you think I am to tell you where you stand?
Track Name: Giving Up
I'm giving up on what we had
It's not that you're poisonous
You're not that bad
Love rises like trees
Sinks us like wayward ships
We rode a carousel
We didn't know how to quit

Yes, I loved you but now I'm three years older
And nineteen will always play fool to twenty-two
Why do you look back when the girl at hand says, hold her
It's getting colder
you're turning blue

I'm giving up on what we were
Love isn't the antidote
It isn't the cure
I say give it time
My guess is a year
You broke in the driver's seat
Shaking with tears

And said there's no one else you would rather saw you crying
And my heart full fell when I realized it was me
I don't mean to say that the whole time I've been lying
I'm only implying
I wish I was free
Track Name: Beautiful Baby
I was not your beautiful baby
I was your innocent child
I was not your beautiful baby
I was your innocent child

Chorus
And tell me that you meant what you said
When you said you loved me still
I loved you, I’ve loved you, I will love you, I always will

I was not your manifold lover
I was your miracled world
You and I weren’t made for eachother
I’m not that beautiful girl

Chorus

I was not an eloquent actor
I was a trembling bird
I said so much I knew didn’t matter
I wonder how much you heard

Chorus
Track Name: Unseen Girl
My love is holding out for an unseen girl
She's written in the stars; she's the end of the world
He waits for her to hold him in her golden arms
She knows some magic word to keep him safe from harm

Chorus
But could you be a little more specific?
Could you tell me about the words she'll sing?
I traveled from the South Pacific;
I've been true to you and everything
If I could fly into the heavens
I'd rearrange the stars to see
If, with a little shift in planets,
The fates could bring you next to me

My love is holding out for an unseen girl
She's written in the stars; she's the end of the world
She’s gonna strike like lighting when the moment comes
Ain’t nothing gonna keep him knowing she’s the one

Chorus

My love is holding out for an unseen girl
She's written in the stars; she's the end of the world
But Saviors come in faces you don't recognize
And if you don't believe in them they're crucified

Chorus
Track Name: True Love
True love, no I don’t love you still
I know you think you do
I know you hope I will
And pure heart, you get nothing for your grief
But salt water in your mouth
Blood staining all your teeth

Am I the one who deals the blow that takes you down?
Hey, you can think on me when you’re heaving on the ground

True love, now you’re so young at heart
Does your mind race in fear
Whenever we’re apart?
And pure heart, I don’t know what to say
I sink to my bedroom floor
The minute you go away

Am I the one who deals the blow that takes you down?
Hey, you can think on me when you’re heaving on the ground

Chorus
Mother told me give it, give it, give it time
Don’t you know I’m wasting yours when I waste mine
Maybe if I give it, give it, give it time to die
Don’t you tell me give it, give it, give it time
And don’t you hold your breath and hope I’ll change my mind
Maybe when you give it, give it, give it time to die

True love, tell me what’s in your soul
Right when you’re most at peace
That’s when you lose control
And pure heart, give me the honest truth
Struck to the cold cement
Here in the bloom of youth

And I’m the one who deals the blow that takes you down
Hey, do you think on me when you’re heaving on the ground?

Chorus
Track Name: Take Me Up Slowly
Oh, take me up slowly
You don’t even know me
Do you know what you want?

I get tacit and lonely
I wish you could show me
you won’t be gone

You, you're making the big time
You’re not even half mine
You don’t even try

Oh, take me up slowly
Grounded and holy
I’m on the line

Oh, take me up slowly
Grounded and holy
I’m on the line

I wish I could trust you
But I want the hard proof
Discernible signs

this feels like a good thing
Feels like it could be
Cracked for the light

Oh come and take me up slowly
Outside it’s snowing
Merry and bright

Oh, take me up slowly
Outside it’s snowing
Merry and bright

Sure, the lights are deceiving
I’d love to believe in
this star-stricken night

I don’t think you’ll hurt me
I think you’re worthy
I think you’re kind

So come, take me up slowly
But take me up surely
Take your time
Track Name: Who Can Say
Here he is
A boy who can’t solve your problems
He wouldn’t know the first way to solve them
He wouldn’t know the first place to start

Here he is
A boy who can’t shoulder your burdens
Whose misgivings about you will worsen
Before your decisionless heart

Chorus
Who can say
what good your good does anyway?
Who can tell
If when you intend well, then will it end well?

Here he is
A boy who can’t solve your problems
How could he? You won’t say you’ve got them
To think that he could is absurd

Here he is
A boy who doesn’t know you will hurt him
How could he? You hide behind curtains
How could he? You don't use your words

Chorus

Here you are
A girl who can’t solve your problems
You’ve gone from the top to the bottom
You run from the east to the west

Here you are
A girl who knows her mind outside nothing
Whatever you do will be sudden
Whatever you think you’ll think best

Chorus
And when you intend well, then will it end well?
And when will it end well and when will it end well?
Track Name: Stay Lovin
There are those who'll come to tell you
I have sometimes played it false
I have used my kind of smiling
Like a bluff and taken all

Quiet whispers in your ear babe
How you should not take my side
Stay lovin, oh darlin!
I feel the changing of a tide.

I got frightened, I took to running
I traveled eastward from the west
When I packed my bags for London
I was sure that I knew best

Quick and willing are your informants
Who'll say you can’t get hold on me
Stay lovin, oh darlin!
I’m not the way I used to be.

You may hear things through the grapevine
You may hear them on the street
But believe me, and don’t believe, please
every single thing you read

I don’t say this to deny them
For some may know me by my name
But stay lovin oh darlin
Though I was she I’m not the same

Twice I let my heart be broken
Then I did not give my heart
Made my faith my base suspicion
Every whole I willed apart

In your mind you’re bound to question
Can a girl like that stay true?
Stay lovin, oh darlin!
I want to stay on loving you.

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